A talented intern working for a large sportswear brand has just completed her fashion studies. As part of her final project she has decided to present a womens wear accessory concept and range.

Using the company where she interns for inspiration, she decides that another price level is needed, so one price point above the sportswear line, but lower than a catwalk line.

Her presentation looked amazing, it was clear, professional and precise so much so that the sportswear company discussed had considered using some of the aspects for their own research.

The college however, failed her, as they didn’t quite ‘get’ the concept.

anonymous fashion college, you are training people, not only to aspire to great levels of creativity and design but also to work professionally in the industry, to be commercial, to understand processes and to be market relevant. Maybe you should look outside the box a little and not just focus on the crazy avant guard.

A much-needed brush up on production procedures and methods was essential for chapter 8 of the book, so with a specific vendor in mind, the flights were booked and hotels reserved.

Now, I’m not going to go on about how hard the job is, or how stressful travel is in order to gain some kind of sympathy, but what I will say is that, these trips ARE tiring, and NOT glamorous. I think the only person who has the glamour job in Fashion is Mme Wintour, and for the rest of us mere mortals we do the late nights and early starts, the plane delays, the long walks from terminal to terminal, the strange taxi drivers and frisky security men.

So, with this in mind, Here is a brief recap of my trip to Portugal this week, all in the name of research.

In order to save money on flights (it’s me buying them now and not an employer) I headed for a German airline which for a bargain fee asked me nicely to change in Frankfurt and then head on to Porto later in the evening.

Knowing that Frankfurt airport is huge and a devil to navigate, I allowed enough time (ok, I hate being late – so, loads of time between my flights) which meant that for Tuesday, dinner was either a hot dog and some fizzy pop at a takeaway stand or a cocktail and bar snacks at the airport branch of the Sheraton.

Cocktail and snacks went down a treat, although I did have to battle with business guests recanting tales of their management meetings, and Swedish football fans glued to the big screen in the corner of the Lemons and Limes Bar. Still – it was enough to send me on my way to the front row of economy where I had a perfect view of how the business travel flies.

With it being 10.30pm, I was awake for precisely 20 minutes of the flight before I drooled and headflopped over my neighbour in the attempt to get some sleep.

On arrival at Porto, the driver, thankfully, was there to whisk me to the hotel 40 minutes further into the Portuguese countryside.

The cosy room was a vision of comfort and seclusion once I arrived and whilst I could have slept standing, clothed and with overnight bag in hand, I did the necessary and spent a further 20 minutes turning all the lights out. Note to Hotel; One light switch can do the job people…. no need for twenty.

Next day – bright and early, I was whisked to the factory where I spent the day working though production procedures, techniques, planning and trims. Now, as much as I would like to describe the details, infrastructure and layout of the above factory, I shan’t, It’s for the book, I need to formulate and turn the prose, and this, my friends takes time.

Relax – it will come, and hopefully you will like..

By the end of the Wednesday I was production’d out, let me tell you. However a glass of wine, excellent food and great company served a proper way to finish the day.

Note for those who are interested, If you travel to Porto and head outside of the town, into the hills of neighbourhood villages, there are no sign posts, no street names, and the most amazing restaurants are hidden in the middle of nowhere.

The one in question where I dined was next to a fabric mill, down an industrial estate, but nevertheless, had a view of a vineyard and amazing food! surprise!

1 hour after leaving the restaurant I was back at a different hotel about to check in. Now bearing in mind it was now 11pm and my flight was at 6am, my stay there was to be brief:

Here’s how check in went..

Me: checking in, the name’s Breuer

Hotel:  yes – staying for 2 nights?

Me: No, just the 1

Hotel: Really?

Me: Yes, really!

Hotel: Can I have your credit card

Me: Sure!, Can I have a wake up call tomorrow morning please?

Hotel: Yes, for what time?

Me: 4am!

Hotel: Of course!

Hotel: Ms Breuer, next time you stay, the breakfast will start at 7am until 10am,

Me: Thanks – good to know!

Hotel: Ms Breuer, would you like to use the gym?

Me: Does it look like I want to use the Gym, It’s now, 11.20 pm and I have to be up in 10 minutes, so it seems.

Hotel: I guess the gym is a no, ah so here is your card and the room is 233.

Hotel: Enjoy your stay!

And with that I headed to a beautiful room which unfortunately would only be required for sleeping and a super quick shower in around 8 minutes.

Thursday morning – with wake up call success, taxi’d and securitied, found me in an empty airport at around 04.30. ggrrrr

With no coffee, no food and no free wifi, I paced up and down the terminal walking like a runway model and finishing each strut with a Paris Hilton pose. Well, where else can one practice? Eventually the coffeehouse opened and an espresso was inhaled.

On the plane additional headflopping and dribbling was managed, and with the arrival at Frankfurt I tried to find some snack to nibble on..

Note to Airport – please make available non chocolate snacks at the magazine counters. Not everyone wants chocolate, some people like muesli bars and furthermore, SOME people are allergic to chocolate and beef jerky is not a true alternative. !

After further plane delays and more pacing  from me) the flight took off, landed and disembarked. I was on home turf.

In a dream world I would be chauffeured back home, lunch would be ready and a stack of magazines and mug of tea would be resting on the sofa. Alas Rather than heading back to my nest, to shower freshen up and relax, I headed straight into my consultancy job to be buried amongst fabric cards, spreadsheets and 106 emails. T’was a long day.

So there we have it, my research trip to Portugal in a nutshell. Busy, tiring but productive.

If you can find one glamorous aspect to that, please do let me know.

All under the heading of The Weirdness that is Paris Fashion Week.

Suppose it takes the focus away from Dior? Non?

Now I won’t lie to you, I generally scour the fashion press for tit bits and highlights, allowing a wonderful ‘fash’ person to do the legwork for me, and in this case its Imogen Fox at the Guardian who made a rather marvelous summary of what we should be focusing our beady eye on over the next few months. Below are just some of the trends to watch for;

Spots – these are big… not literally you understand but metaphorically… Polka dots, large, small, black, white all are clear and present. Is this a traditional trend for Fall? Not sure to be honest but as we’ve had nautical stripes for the past 3 seasons, its nice to go spotty if only for a change of shape.

Big Earrings – think Pat Butcher ( for non Brits see EastEnders). Shoulder skimming, bling or non bling, these ear droplets should neither be subtle nor slight. Be loud and proud my sweet, sweet friend taking care to watch the weight. Ears like a tribesman is by no means chic.

Bag Holding – strange trend I hear you say but not so… Gone are the bent-arm-handle-in -the-crook-of-elbow pose, instead we have large A4 clutch situation, grip it and hold it close to the chest like a sixth former holder her chemistry file.

Long boots – Not convinced this is a new trend as such. I guess the whole ankle freezer styles are out and long knee skimming are in… For those who live in Holland, you will be very aware that long boots have been in for, oh, say, forever. I guess this trend only applies to the Non Dutch population.

Colour red – Watch out for reds, that’s what the big names are pitching. Of course, no one in their right fashion mind calls it ‘red’ Instead think, vermilion, Merlot, burgundy and lipstick.

Coincidentally, just to throw in a plug….I have a whole section in my new book about colour names. In general, the colour shade remains the same each season, it’s the name that changes and just so you know; naming colours is big business. It’s neither to be sniggered at, nor held up in a bar and ridiculed.

Colour naming is a job and a serious profession. Something to aspire to me thinks..

Peacocks  on shoulders and pink fox fur mittens,

Chiffon in plisse and velvet bow clip ons,

Snake-skin and satin, all hues are sublime,

These are my picks from the Gucci Fall line.

Cerise and chocolate with nipped in small waisties,

Wide legs in lilac, red ruffles so dainty,

Deep V’s that slash from the neck to thigh line,

These are my picks from the Gucci Fall line.

Thank you Style.com

It’s merely that I have seen a couple of funnies that show the more , how should I say, amusing side of the industry.

This time its the success of the Biba line which was taken over by House of Fraser in 2009. Making a profit under the leadership of the retailer, Biba has found a new customer base 35 years ater it first hit the scene.

However when pressed to explain the styling, the HOF spokesperson exclaimed it wasn’t a retro collection but merely celebrated the 70’s with jumpsuits, high waisted pants and maxi dresses. Not retro? really? um…….really?

OK!! – I have been told – so I will agree – 70’s is not retro.

The original founder is however less than impressed saying that this collection is too expensive and plans to launch her own label in conjunction with Asda ( for non brits see Target or Walmart as a reference.)

I feel a fashion fight brewing.

Of course you do!  you just want something new and exciting – I realise this!

Hoping I won’t disappoint I come prepared with a little snippet from todays Guardian announcing a new cut of jeans from Levis..

Carrots are out, twisted leg, what? boyfriend…hello? – these days your dude should be wearing the ‘ex-girlfriend jean’

You heard me!

So – imagine how this creative meeting went?

Marketing ” we need a new snappy name for a guy’s denim pant”

Design ” well I’ve seen that the hipsters are still going drain pipe”

Marketing ” drain pipe you say – really? Kids are still going skinny?”

Design ” yes…. on the last research trip which cost the company thousands in expensive dinners and boutique hotels we learnt that men are still wearing skinny. Maybe we can call it the ‘new skinny’?

Marketing ” no – needs to be punchier, how are the sales on the Boyfriend pant”

Design ” no idea, I only draw”

Numbers ” Boyfriend Jean is reacting well in several of our key markets, so maybe we need an equivalent to sell to the men?”

Marketing ” perfect – we’ll call it the girlfriend Jean….no…. wait – sounds too feminine, lets call it the EX-girlfriend Jean….. giving the impression that the guy is cool enough to lose the girl but keep the jeans..

Design + Numbers in unison ” ooh that’s a great idea”

And so a new fit is announced for Levis men!

Whilst it’s not true that i stormed the stage with my superb Paris Hilton impression, it is true that I was overcome with emotion.

23 years I’ve worked in the industry and I’ve merely dreamt of seeing a catwalk show, so to see two in as many days? – of course I was overcome…. who wouldn’t be?

So this season, with my working situation changed, I find myself stuck in Amsterdam with a book to write and an over enthusiastic Jack Russell dog. What are the chances of seeing 1 catwalk show let alone 2 I think to myself?

Not so slim as it happens, dear reader, not so slim.

Fresh out of the box today came a charming FB update announcing that Peter Som would be live-streaming his Fall 11 runway show through the delightful people at Mac and Milk.

I had the extreme pleasure of working with Mr Som in my past life, so am thrilled to be able to see his latest line from the comfort of my living room with my unwritten book and crazy dog.

Friday 11th Feb 10am EST ( US time) – go to Mac and Milk and sign up and join the fash fest.

Cunningham, 81, has documented street fashion in NYC for the past 50 years navigating through those famed streets on a rusty bike with a trusty Nikon.

This seemingly humble creative focused on every walk of life, and not just the 5th Avenue money, making the doc’ more about ordinary people who just happen to be sporting something a little special.

Apparently being somewhat of a recluse (the guy sleeps on a camp-bed surrounded by filing cabinets and he has 4 outfits in his wardrobe, ) the director and producer took 8 years to persuade him to make to film and even then it was a struggle.

Can you believe this? This guy is so ‘unfashion’ it’s fashion.

Expect to see oodles of fashion-ites and celebrities coming out of the woodwork for their 10c of stories and repartee about the guy – even so it has to be worth a peek.

Out in NYC from March 16th – International release also on the cards.

Moving from large totes that contain a little less than the kitchen sink I have moved recently towards clutches and have around 15 or so which are alternated on a semi regular basis.

The latest object of my affections is a cheeky little madam from Royal Republiq is simple and unassuming, can be used for day – or – evening and has colour options. Certainly not too blingy but merely simple and stylish…

Birthday coming up – mmmm – personal present me thinks?